"Grammie & Grampie Rules"

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My daughter Kaitlyn, her hubby Jimmy and new baby Whit live right across the street from us in town. 

We couldn’t love it more.    

Our daughter gave my wife Catherine and me a very detailed list called “How to Babysit Whit.”

Some real gems.

Like “Rock Whit to sleep in a chair or walk around room.”  How did she think we were going to rock him to sleep?  While we’re taking a shower with him?

Another on her list.  “He likes to smile before he falls to sleep.”  Where I grew up, that’s called “gas.”

Or, “If he stops sucking his bottle, take the bottle out of his mouth and reinsert.” 

Thanks so much.  We were thinking we were supposed to shove the bottle in his ear.

But my fav is, “If he tries to eat his hands, he’s hungry.” 

That is so helpful to know.  Maybe the title of a new best-seller parenting book.

Here’s what I’m kind of missing.  Help me with this.

Memo to Kaitlyn.  You lived in your mother’s belly.

She raised you and your sister. 

Hmmm. 

Maybe Kaitlyn thinks we can’t remember how to do anything anymore.  Maybe that’s it.  Half the time we do call the babe “Louis,” our dog.  Probably doesn’t help.

Life is confusing.

I was sharing Grammie and Grampie notes with Becky and Jai Winding in town.  They don’t make ‘em better.

They told me about the marching orders they got from their daughter, Cami. 

I just adore Cami.  Cami’s got the cutest little boy.

Cami did the same thing.  Sat her mom and pop down on her living room sofa for a little “Parenting 101.”

Jai and Becky got strict marching orders that there would be absolutely no drinking while babysitting the precious one.  (They barely drink.)  Jai and Becky just smiled and nodded.  “Yes, ma’am.”   

Now to make sure Grammie and Grampie were following orders, Cami pointed to cameras she installed in her place to make sure they were behaving the rules. 

Well, didn’t really play out that way. 

Becky and Jai quickly become experts at holding the little guy while walking with their wine on their hips ‘out of the camera’s eye.’  Thank God Cami hasn’t caught on. 

Whoops.  Maybe I shouldn’t have put this story in the town paper.

Here’s what I know for sure.  It doesn’t get better than this.

Babysitting.  Best job in the world.

I’ve gotta run.  The baby’s crying in Catherine’s arms. 

Maybe Catherine can’t get that bottle in the babe’s ear.

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Yours,

Jimmy Dunne

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Jimmy Dunne is modern-day Renaissance Man; a hit songwriter of 28 million hit records; songs, scores and themes on 1,400 television episodes; a screenwriter and producer of hit television series’, award-winning book author, an entrepreneur—and his town’s “Citizen of the Year.” Reach out to him at j@jimmydunne.com.